So my darling husband got home last night. I really tried hard not to show my disappointment especially because I can't blame him for us not moving to IVF this month - me not having my meds, and the insurance issue were plenty reason enough. He did talk to Dr. M around lunchtime yesterday, but he didn't get around to calling me back until about 3:30. So we spent some time talking and it is so clear to me that he is just still back in fertility 101 classes and it's just going to take him time to catch up. He didn't really understand why this month was such a good month to do IVF with 13 follicles, than with another month where there is only 5. He asked the doctor if the success rate would go up, and Dr. M said the success rate is still 30%. Therefore Tony really didn't see the reason to jump at it this month. Frustrating, but I'm trying to breathe it all out.
Tony talked about some website he was on where he saw success rates for IUIs ranging from 5-25% (versus the 1-3% the doctor says we have). He talked about how the rate goes up the more follicles you have. Right on honey, but even though I had 13 antral follicles yesterday, when we do an unmedicated IUI I'll only have one that will pop out an egg. He just doesn't understand all the information that is getting thrown at him, and he really is a very smart man when it comes to engineering, finances, etc. I explained to him that if we had done a medicated IUI we may have a few follicles release an egg, but without drugs we'll only have one. I think he is also going to continue to be in denial about his sperm until we go through an IUI with a sperm wash and we see where his counts end up at. We've got low counts plus 3% morphology to deal with, so we shall what his numbers are after the wash. Maybe they will have improved since he's been wearing boxer shorts for the past 5 months. If not, hopefully he will be able to see that and realize that IVF ICSI is our best shot.
On a positive note he did go in this morning to the clinic to have his blood drawn for his infectious disease testing - that is progress. I also decided that I'm going to order all of my meds in the next week so they are all ready to go for IVF should we go forward with that next month or the month after. If I miraculously get pregnant with the IUI this month, well then I'll have to sell my meds.
3 comments:
Well, it's something that he went to the clinic.
And that he talked to the doctor.
And that he's talking to YOU.
My husband STILL doesn't understand how PIO and estrace won't turn an HPT positive. I've had to explain to him the hormones at least a dozen times, and we've been through 2 IUIs and 3 IVFs with ICSI. But at least he's talking to me and asking questions, and it sounds like Tony is doing that, too...
Keep on keeping on with it!!! And good call on the meds, though I hope you have to sell them. :)
It's so hard when the husbands don't get it. Sometimes their are so hardheaded and think they know everything. Given time, hopefully not too much, he should get there.
Good luck, I hope you have to sell your meds!
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