Tony and I reviewed the donor profile last night, and it went well, we both like her, but we have some more questions for the clinic, so I sent them off in an email this morning.
So what is contained in a 13 (It's only 13, not 14 like I said yesterday) page donor profile? Let me tell you:
PHYSICAL CHARACTERISTICS(age, height, weight, hair color/type, eye color, skin color, etc.)
PERSONAL CHARACTERISTICS (ethnicity, marital status, education)
PERSONAL HEALTH HISTORY (this is quite lengthy, several pages - pretty much everything I could possibly know about her health since birth, including sexual history, age of first menstrual cycle, allergies, surgeries, diet, whether she had any cavities - ha ha!!!)
PERSONAL FAMILY HISTORY (personal characteristics of her siblings, parents, grandparents - eye color, height, weight, age and cause of death, family health history)
ESSAY - The last 5 pages are all essay questions answered by the donor. Things like - why she wanted to donate, what she wants in recipient parents, what message she would want us to tell the child, how would she describe herself, philosophy on life, all about her childhood, teen years, family, religion, education, strengths, interests, accomplishments, etc.
We are pretty happy with this first donor profile. She is 28, has a Masters Degree, seems very intelligent in her essay questions, and her physical characteristics are very similar to mine. However we don't get to see a picture so it's hard to know how much she really looks like me or not. She's a pet lover, has 2 cats, and is very close to her family. She's successful in her job. She's also had 2 successful cycles and her eggs have gotten someone else pregnant. I've gone back to the nurse to ask how many total cycles she has done.
Tony just doesn't like only being able to see one donor profile at a time, plus he really wants to see an Italian donor. Therefore I've gone back to our nurse and asked her to drop all of our requirements and search on Italian just to see if there are even any at all. Now don't get me wrong, we are not going to drop all of our requirements just to have an Italian blooded donor - Tony just wants to see if there are any in their database. I think I would like to see a couple of other profiles just to feel like we are doing our due diligence.
That's all for now!
9 comments:
Hey Kelly,
I'm glad that your search is making progress for an egg donor. Kudos to you! I know its hard to be patient, but the right one will come. I think there should be a study conducted to see if love of Italian food is hereditary or learned!? ;)
Thanks for your comment, it means so much to me.
Hugs, Hollie
Sounds like a good plan...you'd hate to have any regrets or second guessing or what ifs? We ended up looking at probably 3-4 in depth profiles before we ended up going back to the first one we saw (mostly due to her success rate, which was very, very good...) There were others that fit our list of desired and must-haves, but at the end of the day, we felt the success rate was most important to us.
Definitely worth checking out everything as long as you're going through the process! We did start to find the process tedious, but then it was behind us and we felt good about how we went through it...I'm sure that will be the case for you, too!
Wow. You know, I never really thought about how much you'd really have to look into with finding a donor. But now that I think about it, I totally get it.
I don't know why I never thought about it like that before (that you are really looking at the characteristics of your child), I mean, I understand genetics and what is really happening, but I think I simply thought once that embryo is in you, it's YOURS. And that's where I stopped. I don't know why I didn't think about genetics.
Wow. I think I'd be overwhelmed. How many donors do you get to look at total? You said Tony didn't like that you could only look at one donor at a time. Is that a rule? You don't get a packet or you have to pass/fail them one at a time?
Sounds like you guys have a good plan and are being really thorough.
Thanks for sharing what a donor profile looks like. It's interesting all that they include, but then again, I would want to know everything I could.
I'm still so excited for you guys!!
Wow Kelly! Things are moving right along for you and Tony and I'm so happy for you. Thanks for sharing what goes in a donor profile ... I've always wanted to know what it entailed.
I'll be thinking of you and Tony ...
Oh good luck with all this. I hope you find a fantastic donor!
Wow, this is all so interesting!! I think I would prefer to look at "all" of the profiles and then choose one, rather than being given them one by one. But maybe they do it the other way for some sort of reason. Another question... if you "reject" #1, could you come back and choose her later, possibly?
Good to hear that you're making progress with your search. I always thought you were able to see a picture. That would make the decision that much easier.
Thanks for explaining what was in the profile. That was cool to hear about. It would be a tough choice to make because there seems to be a lot to consider. I hope that they are able to come up with some Italian profiles for you to look at so at least you can see all of your options. Wishing you the best of luck with your search!
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