7 years ago today.....

I gained an angel. I went to work on Thursday February 15, 2001 and had a very busy day. I was working on a proposal team at the time and the days were long. Plus I had every Friday off so I could go over to my friend Patty's house and help her out with her kids as she fought against breast cancer. I was looking forward to Friday because the previous week Patty was really sick and it was a bad day. I couldn't get her to eat as hard as I tried. I worked until about 8pm and then headed home. I saw the answering machine blinking with at least 4 messages......and I knew. The first message was from Patty's husband asking me to call him. I didn't even listen to other messages. I called him and he confirmed what I already knew in my heart, Patty died just after 4pm.

The weird thing is that I had received an email that morning from a friend of Patty's who lived out of state and she was asking me to be straight with her and tell her Patty's real condition. I emailed her at 4:03pm and told her that she needed to prepare herself because Patty would not be with us much longer. She wrote back a few minutes later and thanked me for being honest. Little did we know that Patty was getting her angel wings at that exact time.

Even though I was prepared for her death, it took many years to let go of the grief and anger that a 34 year old woman was taken from her babies. Her husband remarried 4 years later and so at least the kids have someone who is a mother to them. Unfortunately they don't remember their real mother. They only know her through pictures and the stories of others.

I only knew Patty for 6 years but when I first met her we spent everyday together for 9 months in Spain in 1995. I went over there to work for 3 years and she was there for 9 months. We had so much fun together - we worked hard, but we also traveled all over Spain and we developed a friendship that will endure eternity. It was the best time of my life - I never laughed so hard. I am working on writing down our adventures so that one day her kids can read about our time in Spain. I really need to finish it before the memories fade. There was the time that we took the train to Segovia and I ate an entire bag of gummy bears on the train. Well by the time we got there I was sooo sick. All of our pictures are of me on the ground sitting with a bloated stomach while Patty and our British mate Shabs toured all of the sites. I was miserable but afterwards we couldn't stop laughing.

Patty was an amazing woman. She was extremely smart and witty. She spoke faster than anyone I'd ever met, whether English or Spanish....and she spoke Spanish like a native Madrileña! She was such an amazing friend to me and to many others. After she died I thought I would never have a friend like her ever again.....and I won't....but I've learned to love again. It took me a while to want to have close friendships with other women....to want to open myself up to the risk of loss. However I've been blessed with many other friendships and I'm so grateful. Ann, Lisa, Patricia, Gema, Eva, Leann, Mary, Lara....thank you (only Ann and Leann read my blog).

Here are a couple of pictures of my beautiful friend. One is of Patty at La Sagrada Familia cathedral in Barcelona. The other is of her and I in my apartment celebrating the 4th of July. She made a delicious dinner and we are wearing our red, white and blue while enjoying some fabulous Spanish wine. Oh we drank a lot of wine over there! Also don't you just love my bushy eyebrows and those humungous glasses? Thank God I plucked and got new glasses.....eventually! Not to mention my sexy, high waisted, white jean shorts!

Now I have a special angel who I still think about everyday, I still talk to all the time, and she delivers my prayers directly to God. I love you Patty and I look forward to seeing you again someday.