Rebecca has already retained a lawyer to represent her, and I've been on the hunt for a couple of weeks to find a lawyer to represent us. At first Tarzan was calling the lawyers, but he got too busy at work, so I took over the search. We weren't sure where to get a lawyer - Michigan, Illinois or Texas. After speaking to a couple of really good lawyers in MI, we've come to the conclusion that we cannot pick a MI lawyer. The Michigan surrogacy laws are downright draconian, and basically if we compensate our surrogate we are committing a criminal offense and can go to prison. Our lawyer could even go to prison. Crazy stuff.
We found a lawyer in IL that we like, but because the baby will be born in TX we would have to have a lawyer in TX as well, or as she calls it "agency support". I've concluded that it will be best to pick a TX lawyer. I've spoken to 2 this week and have an appt. with one more next Monday. It's really interesting because every lawyer interprets the law differently and has different levels of risk aversion. One lawyer in TX said it would be no problem if we kept our MI address, but another in TX said he wouldn't even consider representing us if we lived in MI because we would still be committing a crime, and he would be too. He said that simply using a TX lawyer and doing the step-parent adoption in TX court will not protect us from the MI surrogacy laws. He gave us this worst case scenario where the baby was born early and needed catastrophic medical care with insurance bills over $1 million. Well if/when that happens insurance companies will find any way not to pay. They would investigate us and find out that we had done surrogacy while living in MI, and then they would deny payment. We would sue them, and next thing you know the police are on our doorstep. Granted that is far fetched, but it's a lawyer's job to prepare us for all possibilities.
Since Tarzan doesn't love his job he's been hoping that he could transfer with his job either back to MI or to somewhere else. Although the first lawyer didn't care that we lived in MI, she also said she could not legally advise us if we'd be committing a crime or not and said we should talk to a MI lawyer. Well I already know they will tell us that we would be committing a crime. Therefore, whether Tarzan likes it or not, we need to make the move to IL and he is going to have to just stick it out in his job for another year or two until we have a couple of kids. Even though I'm sure other couples in MI find ways around the laws, hide the compensation, and hope for the best; we cannot in good conscience commit a crime even if we don't think we will get caught. We are going to talk about it tonight and come up with a game plan.
Hopefully we will pick a lawyer next week and get going on the contract. With a little luck, we'll have it finalized in March so we can possibly begin insemination attempts in early April. I may be in Germany which means Tarzan will have to go to Dallas by himself, but that's ok.
4 comments:
Goodness, lots to think about and figure out. Hoping you get some information and are able to keep pushing on!
Glad to be caught up on your story. I'm confused as to why Michigan considers surrogacy to be illegal. I understand the state by state thing but don't understand why it's considered illegal especially since I assume you're using Tarzan's sperm (thus making it his biological baby). Can you explain more?
Aside from my questions, I'm glad you are moving forward. It's amazing what a thick skin you need to develop but that strength will serve you well in the long run and someday soon, when you are holding your baby in your arms, it will all be worth it. Hugs!
I'm so glad to be caught up with your journey! Thanks for adding me back as one of your blog followers!
Well, I like the sound of Lawyer #2 much better, he sounds better informed about this subject. What a nightmare, but you are doing everything right. I hope MI gets a clue, don't understand how they have a leg to stand on in these cases. Nutters, all of them.
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